From Grief to Grace: Changing Lives in Prison
Counties Evangelist Kim Hobbs shares his reflections from 12 years of volunteering.
I first became involved in prison work in 2013. My wife, Jo, encouraged me. We had both sensed the call of God on our lives that summer and I had given up my career and was ‘waiting on God’ for the next step. God has always seemed to point Jo and I to people who need care and friendship - to vulnerable youth and young men in particular. Jo suggested I approach the prison.
A Life-Changing First Step
I attended an initial meeting with a prison manager. As I entered the prison building for the first time, I felt God tap me on the shoulder. He said to me very clearly (for me it was audible): “Kim, get used to this. This will be home from home.” It was life-changing. Since that day I always say that there is no place I would rather be ministering than in that prison, sharing life with the men there.
Healing through sharing grief
The course I now lead is for prisoners who have suffered a loss in their lives. It may be a loved one who died or the loss of a relationship; a fellow offender who has been killed, or even the loss of their reputation or career. The significant issue is that it has affected the person’s mental health or wellbeing. They may describe themselves as being ‘stuck’ in their grief. This is not an overtly religious course and is accessible to everyone. That said, we are free to express our Christian beliefs and offer to pray with prisoners.
The most remarkable thing about this course is the huge demand for it. If I go to meet a prisoner about the course, three, four or five others will hear and want to join in. You can see that a huge number of prisoners are carrying grief. In fact, men stuck in grief can often display foolish or even criminal behaviours that may have contributed to their imprisonment. This course can help them make changes to their lives that can open up a whole new future.
Breakthrough moments
During the first course, a man suddenly realised that he had some vital work to do on a family relationship that he had neglected for far too long. He blurted out: “You lot, you’ve changed my life!”
A week later he reported that he had contacted home and had arranged a reunion with that person, and had also sorted a mediator in case there was any discomfort. Wow! I love it when we can prompt a subtle but vital change in someone’s outlook, responses and beliefs about themselves and others.
When prisoners open up to us, we often share a bit about our own faith. Just last week, I had the privilege of praying with a man who had suffered recent bereavement. He cried for his loss but was grateful for the opportunity to chat and pray.
Sometimes we arrange an informal ‘celebration service’ to remember a person who has died. Men open up on this course in ways that I haven’t often seen in the prison environment. It’s moving and humbling.
God’s love for prisons and prisoners
There are real challenges right now in the criminal justice system and prisons. Please do pray for the huge variety of people who work with prisoners, from the prison officers to people
who provide education, mental health support, advice, medical care, and the chaplaincy teams.
Personally, I love working with offenders. They are people who need our love and support. If you have been the victim of crime, then I understand that this might seem at the very least a difficult statement. But over the years I have listened to many men and women tell their story, and many times I have had to hold back tears. I remember well the simple words of Romans 3:23-24:
“For ALL have sinned and fall short of the glory of God and ALL are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus.”
It certainly is not an easy road to redemption for a prisoner. Saying sorry – being sorry even - is not enough. Theirs is a challenging road to travel. It is our privilege to meet them on the way, point them to Jesus and the future, and cheer them on.